Fitting In

It's bad enough that I find it hard to fit in society because of my sexuality. I've got to work thrice as harder as the normal straight guy because of the simple fact that I like boys. My parents have vocally addressed their concerns about me being gay and now, I gotta work harder to please them. Plus, I've got to work harder to fit in with the crowd. A few of my girl friends' boyfriends are wary to be around me because they think that I might jump on them... Uh, really? Just how ignorant can you be? Just because I like boys doesn't mean I'm going to jump onto any hot guy I see. That's just insulting.

And ironic as it may be, I'm having a difficult time fitting in the gay society as well. Well, more specifically among my gay friends.

See, a lot of them fit the stereotypes of what a gay man is: effeminate, wears make-up, unusually high pitched voices, and thoroughly into fashion. There are a lot of times wherein I cannot relate to any single thing they're saying because all they talk about is clothes, designers, photographers, etc. Why? Well because those things don't really interest me at all.

Instead of fawning over the latest clothing line of a famous designer, I'd rather go ahead and boot me up some video games and play until the wee hours of the morning. I may not know the latest designer bags or latest clothing down the runway, but if you need to know the latest video games, television shows, comic books, indie music then I'm your guy. I'm a geek. Well, a gay geek to be exact.

It's not that I don't like being around my friends, but it does get frustrating sometimes wherein you can't join in the conversation because you just can't relate. I love them, but I a lot of the times, I get really shy and tongue tied around them.

Hmm... Maybe I need to get out more. Maybe I need to put myself out there and find people with the same interests as me.